Sunday, September 26, 2010

long time no post

I really tried this past week, but something was wrong with my internet and not it just wasnt loading well, so I gave up.
anyway, its been a very long couple of weeks, with work and workouts. I had a crazy week last week with a few days of over 1000 calories burned, yes, you read that right. I had two nights where I was at the gym for 3 hours, If that is what its gonna take to zap these last few pounds off of me, that is what I will do.
I have had a few things said to me this past week that doesnt sit well with me at all. And I am going to bitch about it here.
. When people tell me I am good, I dont need to lose any more weight.
I HATE THIS. for the sole reason that I am NOT DONE, I have not reached my goal that I set out to reach. I will not just stop where I am at cause I look "fine". If I did that ,I would feel like I failed to reach my goal. regardless of the weight I have lost ,I will feel like I failed, because I didnt reach the goal that I set out to do. I think people dont get it, when you have been overweight your whole life ( or as long as I can remember) I really want to be able to say for the first time " I have no weight to lose" not that I would walk around saying that, but people say all the time, " I would like to lose, 10, 20, 30 pounds" I dont want to still be able to say that. I dont really expect anyone to get it, but that is how I feel about it.
Sometimes I feel bad when people want me to help them , and I cant seem to do lose this last bit myself, so how can I help someone else??
On a Good note, and this is a very very good note. I bought my first pair of size 6 pants on Friday. Size 6. so I know that when I lose my last 9 pounds, I will fit into a 6 on pretty much every brand, not just one :) I still cant do the skinny jeans, I just have too muscular of the legs to pull that cut off, but that is OK . Loving the boyfriend jeans.. I even got my friend Jenn to like them after she said she would never wear them , :)
Posting a picture from this weekend that I really like of me :)

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